waiting

Another post about waiting.

Mark and I saw the oncologist today. The chest x-ray shows slight (3 mm) growth on the measurable nodule in my lung. It shows no new nodules (good news) and no pleural effusion (don’t ask me what this means, it has something to do with fuzzy stuff that might indicate the cancer is on the move)–also good news.

But the growing thing, not good news.

However, the drug I’m on usually takes 6-8 weeks to be effective. My x-ray was taken at more like 5 1/2 weeks. So, we are going to wait another 4 weeks and see what my lungs look like on a CAT scan. If it seems the Faslodex is ineffective, we need to (in our doctor’s words) “pull the ripcord.” Pulling the ripcord means chemo.

And I really don’t want to do chemo again. Really, really, really.

It is not crazy to think that Faslodex still could work, or I’d be off it as of today. When it does work, it often works for years (like 3-5) so we’d really like to give it a fightin’ chance.

So, we’re waiting until May 22, at which time we should know what’s next.

Just like every time we have an appointment with the doctor, Mark and I waited for over an hour to see him. However, this time I was reading a great book and didn’t really care when he showed up. By the time he did, I was even still in a pleasant mood and rather reluctant to put my bookmark back in.

Hmmm, perhaps that pile of books in my living room might be just what I need for the next four weeks. Waiting may not be all that hard after all.

16 thoughts on “waiting

  1. hmmm…ok, so 4 weeks to hope, trust, pray, lean hard, havahavis, read, run, thrift, do arts and crafts….and wait. love you girl, jane

  2. Well, you’ve just bumped up to the top of the prayer list.

    Praying for… these weeks to fly by, the Faslodex to kick it up a notch, an amazing x-ray, and–while I’m at it–some great spring days to enjoy.

    Love to all the M-T’s.

  3. …and a trip to Asheville in the next four weeks, too (for more and more thrifting and crafting).

    What else can be said in the comments section of a blog? You must know how much I love you.

  4. OK Tash, as you’ve said before, I’m going to try to focus on the positive signs, and try to hope for the best for the stoppage of the growth. But of course, we will continue our prayers. (Right now you and Sarah are tied for first, but I’m hoping you can both be bumped down to about #10 soon.)
    Love you tash,
    anne

  5. know that you are waiting with lots of company waiting with you, sending you love, energy and the hope of the next four weeks kicking ass.
    as always, thanks for sharing – it helps to direct my thoughts and prayers.
    k

  6. speaking of reading, that David Sedaris book saved me from “bahama boredom” (yes, it exists.) over spring break, but now it is completely demolished. it slightly resembles a book salvaged from Titanic’s wreckage: wet and sandy, with a hint of mildewy odor. anywho, your new book is in the mail, courtesy of amazon.com and my babysitting money! i figure that money is going back where it belongs. good karma, i guess. . .
    i hope you don’t mind!

    on an entirely different note, i will be praying continually for you over the next month. waiting is kind of a bummer. know that you are loved. i mean, LOVED. and God will never leave you. not ever–like Daisy at dinner time, right?

  7. alright lady.
    can you feel the love? can you hear all these peeps praying their most earnest prayers on your behalf? i hope so.
    and i must also say that although you may not always feel graceful and vibrant and beautiful, you sure are a beacon of all those things to everyone around you. you really are an amazing woman and i am so thankful we are friends.
    thanks for sharing this bumpy journey with us.

  8. Like everyone has mentioned, you are one LOVED woman. A mom, wife, sister, sister in law, friend, you name it….you are a true gem. Daily prayers and thoughts for you Tash. Thank you for sharing.
    Love you!
    Beth

  9. I truly hope the waiting is not hard at all – much like reading your great book in the waiting room – and most importantly, that the chemo will not be – now, or ever – a reality for you.

  10. love to you from Tulsa. Praying that this drug kicks in amazingly & that chemo would just be a distant memory. You are awesome. You are wonderful. You deserve chocolate today…. and a glass of “medicinal spirits”….perhaps a great Merlot. :o)

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