Jesus Calling

jesus-calling-for-kids.jpgZoe wanted to start the new year with new devotional books, so we picked up two. One of these we are reading after dinner. It is Jesus Calling: 365 Devotions for Kids. Mark and I would like to rename it: Jesus Calling: 365 Devotions for Kids to Read Aloud while Their Parents Cry. We are obviously not far into the book, but each devotional has hit home. Yesterday it was about being patient with God’s timing.

I tried to keep reminding myself of that today as I received my new chemotherapy, Halaven. Halaven will likely give me more fatigue and nausea and maybe some more hair loss. However, Halaven also gives me hope that the fluid production in my lungs will slow and that I’ll be able to be done with it once and for all with a pleuradesis (sp?) procedure. I am still producing over a liter a day of nutrient-leeching fluid and blood. My mornings are the worst as I try to make up for the fluid lost in the night. I must force myself to eat and drink. Usually by late afternoon and evening I am up and about, if a bit drained. My parents stay with me throughout the day doing all that needs doing and more. They are shouldering our burden exceptionally. There aren’t words of gratitude that suffice.

And if my earthly parents are doing this for us, what must my heavenly parent be doing? I imagine God is telling me to be patient and that things will happen in God’s time, not mine.

As I was settling into my chair for chemo today, I got a text from a former student. It said, “Praying for you today, Mrs. Turner. Remember God is in control.” I wonder if this was Jesus Calling again.

The Battle of the Pleural Fluid

Mark and I met with Dr. Campbell this evening. We hoped for some clarity on why I have been feeling so awful. We had the results of a CAT scan from Tuesday and tumor marker numbers from a blood test on Tuesday as well.

We didn’t get the clarity we were hoping for, but we did get this… We are still winning the War (though I usually shy away from these “war on cancer” analogies, it works in this case). My tumor marker numbers were drastically lower–great news. And the CAT scan showed mostly reduced tumor activity with only a few nodules increased slightly in size. So, on paper, I’m doing fine. But. I feel awful most of the day. So it’s the Battle of the Pleural Fluid that we are trying to resolve to get to the bottom of why I’m so nauseated, etc.

This will take us back to the Interventional Radiologist to get the pleural fluid resolved faster. We will be making calls in the morning to try to get seen by him. Dr. Campbell is deferring to his expertise on the mechanics of draining the lung–there may be other options than the bulky lung drain I have in now. In addition to the physical draining, Dr. Campbell will be putting me on a new chemo to try to dry it up as well.

So, grateful for our position in the “war”, Mark and I are embarking on the Battle of the Pleural Fluid. With the unflagging support we have around us, we must be able to turn this one around. Thank you for your prayers. Dearly.